Published Jan 23, 2023
Life can sometimes feel like we have nothing but problems. That would be the case if we never solve them, and that's all we focus on. After one problem, we have another, and the cycle continues. What if we see problems as opportunities? Could we equip ourselves better to handle them?
Problems to me feel like the Trojan Horse, opportunities in disguise? The problem is the Horse; the opportunities are within it. If you're not familiar with that, here it is in short.
The story of the Trojan Horse is about the Greek's trickery in entering the city of Troy by building a wooden horse, which the Trojans brought inside the city, believing it was a gift from the gods. Inside the Horse were Greek soldiers, who emerged at night, opened the city gates for the Greek army, and sacked the city, ending the Trojan War.
So what does having problems mean for us? The only way to unravel the opportunity is by accepting the problem.
Think of it as a signal from God, the universe, the higher power; whatever you believe, it's helping to shift and shape you in your journey. Something you would never choose to do for yourself in such a way.
Welcome, the Horse!
Our language forms a big part of how we respond to the world around us. We create meaning from what we experience with much weight. We can turn the smallest of experiences into something entirely enormous.
Here is an example. I sat writing this newsletter in the coffee shop and noticed someone who is also a frequent coffee buyer. He passes me and says, "Don't you have a home to go to?". I instantly create meaning from it and could quickly go into a negative thought process. The questions I could ask are:
If I let his language dictate my meaning, I wouldn't be in control. With the same thinking, we need to change our language in how we label the world. Consider the following alternatives and perhaps many more that you use today that need changing.
Develop better, more empowering belief systems. What you believe is what you experience. When you do, you give parameters to your focus so that the mind begins to delete anything outside of it. It’s not the scenario you want. Empowering beliefs creates positive focus and better experiences.
If something doesn't serve you, could it be that the way you define it stops you from overcoming it? Reframe it so you can pass what’s stopping you.
Before any challenges arise, make sure you have a sound belief system about what those are. Nothing should take you by surprise. If they do, create positive meaning by analysing them [see below].
Spend less time trying to understand why you've been challenged and more time on solving it. The quicker you accept, the less you dwell on negative thoughts. Decide and commit to solving it.
Taking on a problem with the wrong state is like combating fire with more fire. What state would be best to resolve the challenges we face? Could we remove the state of anger with confidence or curiosity?
Before you can overcome the challenge, know what you're up against. In the wrong state, without clarity, you make a small obstacle into a monster. When you know what it is, get to solving it.
Be aware and notice what the results are from the actions. If something doesn't work, it doesn't mean you failed; you need to adjust and try again. Keep adjusting until it works.
There is no new type of pain; nobody has experienced something else that someone hasn't. Find role models who have experienced or overcome what you're experiencing already.
As Marie Forleo say, “Everything is Figuroutable”.
Founder, Growth Coach, People Developer, Strategist,Unconventional Thinker, Aligner, Clarifier